Why Women Like Fifty Shades of Grey?
When you take a minute to critique the book ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ by E.L. James, it becomes obvious within a few chapters that there is no literary genius. The plotline is standard, albeit a little bit dramatic and cheesy, and the BDSM and bondage sex scenes don’t tend to follow what’s typical of the BDSM porn scene. So, why is it that it ended up being a book translated into various languages, a best seller, and with millions of copies hidden away in women’s side table drawers?
If they’re not reading it for the quality writing and technique, why are they reading it at all? We uncover a few of the many reasons below.
The Main Character’s Qualities Are Attractive
Every woman knows that there is no such thing as a man who’s adoringly sensitive, yet is distant, masculine, and wildly attractive at the same time. Women generally want a man who will sit and listen to their feelings, comfort you, then grab hold of you and carry you to the bedroom for some bondage sex and BDSM. Because it’s nearly impossible, if not impossible, to find someone like this, it makes the main character, Christian Grey, all the more alluring and exciting.
What you usually see – both in real life and in movies and books, is a man that plays hard to get. He won’t respond to texts or calls, and it takes some time to find out whether he’s into you or not. Christian Grey, however, tells Anastasia from the beginning that he wants her and communication is never a problem – even when admitting his affinity with BDSM.
The Tension Drives You Crazy
While most of the books and movies you read and watch cut right to the action, in Fifty Shades of Grey, it takes a little longer to get to the BDSM and bondage sex. Typically, critics would comment on this kind of behavior as “drawn out” and “takes too long to get to the point” but in Fifty Shades of Grey, it’s the complete opposite.
According to relationship coach and psychologist Dr. Niloo Dardashti, women find foreplay to be the most exciting part of sex. Therefore, they relate to the sexual frustration, build up, then the main event. Even if it seems utterly frustrating as you read pages and pages of foreplay, it’s what keeps women glued to the book. What’s more, it’s what keeps them coming back for more.
It Takes You Back
For some women, Fifty Shades of Grey is a way in which to relive the first time you fell in love. It helps you to feel those butterflies in your stomach, that sexual longing, and the lovemaking that followed. For some people, it even offers glimpses of those memories of bondage sex and BDSM, if that was your cup of tea. In essence, some women choose to read Fifty Shades of Grey because it’s a reminder of the feelings and scenarios of first love, and how it felt to be near your significant other when you first laid eyes on them.
Sex is a natural part of life – after all, to get a life, traditionally you’d need to have sex. However, Fifty Shades of Grey takes it to a new level by being a sexual escape for the sexually frustrated. In a sense, it’s book porn. You get to read the intimate details of lovemaking, use your imagination, and be drawn into an entirely erotic fantasy world of BDSM and bondage sex. While you don’t see it with your eyes, you’re able to read it, fantasize about it, and, not to be crude, get off to it.
It’s Undoing Modern-Day Expectations
Traditionally, it was a man’s job to take control, put food on the table, pay the bills, and take part in “men’s work.” Today, however, women take on a more independent role and, in many cases, won’t allow themselves to feel like a damsel in distress or someone who needs a man. For all the independence that single, confident women have, there is still a part of many who do want men to take control. They want to be submissive, for the men to overpower them and even open their eyes to the world of BDSM and bondage sex.
Women like Fifty Shades of Grey for a number of reasons, and it’s hard to pinpoint just one. One thing’s for sure; it has created a distinct shift in bedroom behavior that has saved and spiced up the sex lives of many.